Runionism's

 

Very silly thread revolving around a new name for Mike Runion, who for some strange reason thought his name was one of the funnier ones on the list.......


j.James Dignan

Subject: a Runion, an "x", and a long red bottle of something fiendish
 
 

>Mike (who must come up with some sort of new moniker since his name is one

>of the funnier ones on this list) Runion ;)
 
 

>I vote for Mike "Long Train" Runion. With apologies (however insincere) to

>the Doobie Brothers.

>-russ
 
 

>(this only works if "Runion" rhymes with "onion", of course)

hey now! There's no need for this! Runion is an ancient and noble name! I did a quick scan on Not-scape to see what I could find:

1) Sven Snorri Runionssen in 1733 opened the world's first Icelandic takeaway restaurant. It was unfortunately unsuccessful - no-one wanted to take any Icelanders away.

2) The Runion Symphony was written in 1887 by Boris Glevunov. This controversial work used fish as musical instruments.

3) The runion is a variety of finch, a small bird that lays an egg 10% larger than the bird itself. Then it dies. Wouldn't you?

4) Baron Norbert von Runion rocked the scientific world with his 1936 discovery that Atlantic salmon always return to the same polling booth in which they first voted. The reason for this phenomenon remains unknown.

5) "The Runion Declaration" guaranteed that the native population of Sarawak, Malaysia, would be given 137 toenail clippers annually by the British Government.

6) The Tuareg people of the Sahara desert have 167 different words for snow. All of these words sound like "Runion".

7) The small Dorset village of Runion Greatquail is the site of the annual All-Britain squid-hurling championships. The national record is 177 feet, 4 and 1/4 inches.

James


Dorset, Dignan, and Duplicity (i% Robyn Content)

Date: Tue, 17 Jun 97

From: The Great Quail

James writes:

>hey now! There's no need for this! Runion is an ancient and noble name! I

>did a quick scan on Not-scape to see what I could find:

Bless you James Dignan, for both your astonishing research and for your witty paraphrasing. I wish Liecos and Disinfoseek could turn up that sort of information for me more often, heh heh. For your troubles, I appoint you the official Keeper of the Runion Sentence.
>7) The small Dorset village of Runion Greatquail is the site of the annual

>All-Britain squid-hurling championships. The national record is 177 feet, 4

>and 1/4 inches.

I feel that I should add that Not-scape may have not been properly updated regarding this event. The judges later found out (Thanks to some loose lips at the local pub, the Inky Brew) that the winner had actually used an octopus with two extra tentacles stapled into his head, and several lead weights inserted into his tummy in order to give it extra throwing weight. Also, this "winner" turned out not to be all-British at all, but really a Bostonian with a vague lisp and a family history on playing pranks on the British that dates back to the Boston Tea Party. So The record of 174 feet, 3 and 1/3 inches (set in 1974 by Ray Davies, no relation to you know who) still stands. Or, to be more precise, flops. 

- The Quail

PS: A Runion sentence? I wonder if thats what a judge hands out to a 

woman who is found guilty of finding a Runion in her stalking. . . . 

PPS: Kill me now, it's only merciful.


Here endeth ( mercifully ) the Runionism thread 

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